Yet Again

 

Yet Again (Randyjw; March 24, 2019)

 

You don’t even want to read this. I’ve got really bad vibes going on, right now.

 

A couple of nights ago, at the location next to mine, where I had been beaten up, some people were sitting and talking, some portions of the conversation being overheard by me. They were horrible, and went like this: “I’m gonna f… her! That b…. is mine!” One person piped up, “Don’t f… with her.” A new person in the past two weeks, if that, had shown up at that spot, effectively ousting my friend from it (really, there are no “friends” on the street, as I’ve been told by someone I was nice to, who then went on to start malicious rumors against me), and with whom I had a few mind-bending discussions with regarding religion. There had previously been an older-seeming couple who had occupied that spot, and were, despite their personal lifestyle, essentially “good neighbors.” But, they had left, and when the spot had been vacant for quite some time, I mentioned it to my friend, who started staying there for some time. It is why, in my previous story, I knew that the guy who showed up and beat me up was not, to my knowledge, being truthful in stating that he had been there for a long time, and that I had not been at my own spot for a long time. I actually eventually occupied the former spot of the girl who had started some bad rumors; she permanently left the area, and I waited some time to make sure it was really “clear.” When I had told the guy that there was someone in my spot, and I just let them be without waking them, for a minute he took my side and said, I’m gonna help a sister” and started heading for the sleeping woman. But, I called him back and said no, no, no, and he turned around.

 

Well, I was fearful that the people having this conversation about a woman was me; but, then I just told myself I was being paranoid. I had seen the tallish, heavyset woman walk by the previous evening, followed by a tallish, heavyset man (both in this group having the conversation), past my spot and around the corner, where nobody really stayed, except for my friend, who had had to take a worse spot out back, and another guy who hides behind one of the building’s external fixtures. The woman also seemed to have asked someone whether they had been talking to the girl in question, to which another guy said, “Just to say ‘hi’ and ‘bye’. I was wondering if the person sitting there had been the one who’d started staying at the spot, with whom I’d conversed with for quite awhile, on separate days.

 

Anyways, one of the guys from the group got up, and was kindof making as if walking by, but dawdling. Oh, no.. the dawdlers. He turned around and smiled at me, acting friendly, and walked over to where I was. Alarm bells ringing now. He said something, which I didn’t hear, but I told him I don’t like to talk with people at night (it was late afternoon and still light out). My instincts were right. He told me that it had been his brother who had hit me, and that now he was in jail because the cops found him with an ounce of weed on him, and it was my fault because I’d given a description. In all reality, I don’t think I ever described the man, or was asked to by the dispatcher, but only mentioned his sneakers, a blue hoodie (maybe it was a hat…?), and gold in his mouth. Meanwhile, as he kept approaching me, I kept pushing him away. He said all those nasty things to me I’d overheard (I’m gonna f… you. You’re my b….. now. I’m gonna kill you!). We had a struggle, which kindof messed up my back, my hip, and my general body for several days afterward. He wanted me to tell the story, though, so I did, but wound up leaving parts out, in my panic, and as I have in my postings (like it might’ve been the guy who came back, who had said he would – – and while I had met with the police – – and had brought a girl with him and they were smoking that “stuff.” Maybe she alerted them? Who knows! I just tried to warn the girl to get away from that dangerous, violent man. She was trying to mediate between us, ‘cuz I wanted to take the guy’s picture, and he was denying it was him, but when I saw the sneakers, and his blue hat… well…)

 

The brother mentioned there were no bruises (did he read the report?), and I said, well, there weren’t, but how can you see inside my head? And the guy said his brother said he’d hit me with a pillow. And I was like, I didn’t see any pillow. I basically told him the general story, and then mentioned that his brother just went off on me. He then said, “He lied! That sounds like my brother!”, and was getting upset! Then, I was like no, no, no… I didn’t press charges. Don’t be mad. I really don’t want to be the continued scapegoat in this saga, or drive brothers apart, however thuggish they’ve been. Had I been able to describe him better, or known who he was, and if I hadn’t been lied to (or, euphemistically, been misinformed) regarding the filing fee, then I might’ve. But, there’s this so-called street justice I’ve, unfortunately, got to consider. Here, things really aren’t “just”. And good guys just don’t win.

 

Update (March 25, 2019):

The “conversationalists” HAD come back. The bad vibes I’d had for a good portion of the evening were leading up to that. I’d felt that people had been watching me as I walked to the spot. I saw a guy talking with a girl, then he went on the outside of the fence (it’s fenced in, now; it’s better “privacy,” but then again, it’d be awhile ’til they found my decomposing body, in the event…

 

The brother of the guy came over, actually introduced himself (I think I heard his name, but I won’t mention it, here), and stuck out his hand for a handshake. Yeah, right. I wasn’t feeling the love, and I was like, That’s okay; thanks. The heavyset woman was doing her scouting thing, again, walking past me and back, several times. I was like, oh, no… here we go, again… Fortunately, nothing happened, but I did lose hours of sleep worrying, waiting, and watching…

 

I really need to utilize my time better to try to get myself out of homelessness. WordPress, and the community here, have been my saving grace, my sanity-saver, if you will, from all this madness. However, I may be taking a break, if I can, to focus more on looking for employment, etc. I’ve been writing here for about seven years, or so, and that should be enough of a body of work for anybody to determine if they ever want to hire me for a writing job, or not. I know… don’t give up the day job! So, considering that I don’t have one, I need to find one. I’m not sure that I can really take a break… I need to read you, to feel you, and to express myself, as well. But, if I’m not as active, if at all, you’ll understand the reason why. And, please know that I’m OKAY! Love you all! xoxoxoxoxoxooxoxoxo and 🙂 🙂 🙂 🙂 !!! Haha!

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